Broken Man

Posted: April 3, 2013 in Uncategorized
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What have I done?

Sneaking away from 11 years of love in the darkness of the night

But, what have I done that is worse than what she’s done to me

So much for eleven years, spoiled, by two days of perpetuated insolence

Abandoning my heart

I only wanted and vowed to love her

Now I live in my car, not wanting to be too far from home

Maybe she’ll take me back and forgive me for leaving her alone

The pink rose I picked from someone’s yard stuck me deeply

Reminded me of the pain I felt when…

When….

I found out. 

Would she have told me?

I cried so hard, alone, with no one in sight

Beggin’ this broken-heart of mine

To just give it one more try

And I, pride thick, ego quick to talk myself away from her

Gouging myself on the thorn of relationships rose

Black and dying, so much for trying

Something inside is telling me that I need her to survive

Need her to keep me alive…

I’m lost, nailed to a cross that I have to bear

Memories of her, bare with another…..

I can’t bear to say it, can’t stand to think of it

So I left, rather than see her face

Rather than stay in the same place

I ran, fearing the struggle to forgive her

Fearing what I would do in a moment of anger

Fearing…or just afraid of learning to trust all over again

My heart – literally hurts, not figuratively like in a story or poem

I’m crushed and alone

Tired of ignoring the calls to my phone, deleting messages before they play

Is there hope for a broken man?

What more can I say

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