Last Words

Posted: January 31, 2012 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , ,

“Love is stronger than death even though it can’t stop death from happening, but no matter how hard death tries it can’t separate people from love. It can’t take away our memories either. In the end, life is stronger than death.”

What Would You Say B4 You Die

Have you ever thought about that?  I know I haven’t.  I read an article on and it talked about what people talk about before they die.

The article raises the subject of religion and its place at your bedside at the time of your death.  I can’t say that I have personally given much thought to what I’d say or even talk about on my deathbed but, I’m sure that I would talk about my family.  Talk about my sons and their accomplishments; reflect on my life and the life that my mother gave me.

I probably wouldn’t give much thought to my father; wouldn’t want to spend what little strength I have on him.  Maybe, just maybe I’ll forgive him for abandoning me when I was just a child.  Would I call on God?  A good question, though I’m not sure of the answer.  I don’t call upon any divine deity on a regular basis, well unless I’m upset but, that doesn’t count.

When we are on our deathbeds, at the apex of existence, do we dwell upon something as conflict-ridden and confusing as religion, would you want your caretaker or family members to discuss the possibilities of your soul in the afterlife?  Or would you talk about the life you lived, or about the family, the kids, your husband or wife?  Or do we spend our last earthly breaths going over “heaven-sent” assurances that came with no guarantee?

What is the soul?  A soul – in certain spiritual, philosophical, and psychological traditions – is the incorporeal essence of a person, living thing or object. (Wikipedia)

Overstanding the makeup of the human soul is as complex as analyzing the human brain.  There are so many levels and depths of the soul that possibly goes untapped and unused.  The surface soul is the tainted one, the confused one, the one that is guided by outside of mind-body influence, i.e., preachers, pastors, rabbi’s and imams.  Some do not have souls; I truly believe that, that aside, what is inherently important to you?

How do we discuss God without first discussing Love?

I don’t understand people that would say not discussing God at the time of your death is wrong.  Why?  When my son lost his grandmother, we wept hard for her; she was loved and we let her know that every day.  Up until the end, she asked for candy, ice-cream and jokingly cigarettes.  I don’t think sitting around and talking like a bunch of instant theologians simply because her time was near would have been more beneficial to the last days she spent with us swaddled in love.  She loved her grand-children so much and she would talk about them.  She talked about the old days, discussed the life she lived and the lives we lived with her.  We never discussed God or death; she knew her time was coming.  Her last words to me were, “So long.”

As I came to be with her after she passed, my expression of love was to rub what was left of her hair, kiss her forehead and to tell her that I loved her and I was content with that.  In my heart I believe she would have been content with that as well.

“We don’t learn the meaning of our lives by discussing it.  It’s not to be found in books or lecture halls or even churches or synagogues or mosques.  It’s discovered through these actions of love.” ~ Kerry Egan

It’s difficult to talk about death as I and those reading this definitely are not experts on it, not at least while we’re living but, it’s a reality that we all must face.  What we’ll say on our deathbeds is unknown to us so, let’s live and live well until our time to dwell on that gets here.

Hopefully, not for a long time.

If you’re interested in reading the CNN article:

  1. Krown says:

    I just read this on the commute. Heavy food for thought; Especially in the morning when your brain is trying to malleate all sorts of things to come. Anywho… I’ve enjoyed the read (as usual)and will spread this word.


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