Ladies and Gentlemen…The Secretary of Defense

Posted: January 26, 2012 in Uncategorized
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The Secretary Of Defense


She is your ex’s best friend, her ace boon-coon and she’s mad as hell that you had the audacity to break up with her girl and she has a few choice words for you…

She doesn’t know who you are!  She knows of you, about you and things your ex may have told her that is fueling this indelible fire that is raging somewhere in cyberspace.  It’s safe to say, that your ex, didn’t share the nice sweet stuff that you and her went through so now instead of one sour Sally that you’ve pissed off, you now have Vicky Vendetta who is there to take up the reigns and fight you for the remaining scraps of her best friends’ heart.  Go figure.

Now that you and you ex-girlfriends relationship is over like Heidi Klum & Seal, it’s Vicky’s self-appointed mission to defend her friends’ emotions, her qualities, and all the little things that make her such a great woman (things that drove you away in the first place) as well as her honor and she will at all cost try to make your life a living hell (cause that’s what she’s going through without you).

Fellas, you open up your email or your Facebook page and you see her name and it hits you like a Ric Flair chop across your chest, “WHOOOOO!”  First, we may think that it’s a set-up; your ex put her up to it, to test you, to see if you had secret desires for her all along?  Or maybe, she’s trying to holla-at-you?  You remember your lady telling you to stay away from her because she’s a ho.  Known to be looser than the ceilings on the Big Dig, if the space was there, she would probably try to kick it with you behind her back.

But, alas this is not the case.

So, you open up the email or Facebook message and it starts.  Errant rambling, character blasting, an emotional babble-filled bluster of accusations, baseless indictments, and finger pointing at someone she barely even knows.  But, it’s okay because she is defending the honor of her girl, right?  Give me a break!  I think this is only allowed in the human-animal kingdom.  When a woman takes it upon herself to step in where her friend stepped out and chooses to voice her and your exes concerns, clearly violating any codes of privacy, civility and respect.


First of all, if your ex-girlfriend cared about the sanctity of your relationship or had a shred of respect for you, she would immediately let her SOD know that it’s not cool and potentially hazardous, for her to go after you like that because it’s none of her business.  Secondly, your ex knowing that she gave you all kinds of dish-dirt about her friend,  should know that you would immediately tell intricate details of the nasty things that she be doing and all the men she sleeps with that she only shared with her “bestie”, the one who’s honor she is trying to defend.   In the end, Vicky is found defending herself against the man she’s trying to condemn and her supposed home-girl that tells all the dirty details of her less than perfect life.

So, what can we do to stop our ex-girlfriends’, friends from calling you or defiling your character on social websites?  Is there a need to pay attention to it or do we let it ride out?  Do you call your ex and ask her to cease and desist all activities against you or face legal action?  I mean, how serious is this?

In my humble opinion, I think it’s the dumbest thing anyone could ever do.  First of all a relationship is established between two people.  No one on the outside should have any say, at least not to the ex, if the relationship ends.  My people shouldn’t be calling her and vice versa.  If I’m emotionally attached to my ex, I may want to back out and regroup and come back a better person, a better man – if she’d have me but, if you have your home-girl trashing my name on your behalf, then we are gonna have problems too.  It’s great that, the friend was cordial with you while you were dating your ex but, “How did she get your number anyway? Why does your ex trust her now enough to just give her your information, what if she swooped down and tries to scoop up homeboy for herself?  There are so many things that could go wrong; just don’t do it!

Ladies, let your home-girls fight their own battles, you’ll only make it worse for her, for you and for any possibility that the two of them get back together.  That email, phone call or Facebook post will always be in the back of his mind and he may never trust her and may not have many nice things to say to Vicky if he sees her again.

So, stand-down young lady, sit down and mind your own damn business because everyone else may already be minding yours!

– CT
January 26, 2012

  1. Melissa Green says:

    lol, good stuff. interesting perspective.

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